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Hard not to compare
We’re in our 3rd year of waiting for someone to choose us – really me – to raise a child. Recently I started checking out other adoption profiles to see how my profile compared to theirs.
While they are married, I’m single and living with my boyfriend for over 12 years now.
While they already have children of their own, sometimes even biological children, I’m waiting to be matched with my first.
While it seems they are always traveling, we’ve been staycationing it to make sure we have plenty of PTO for the call we’ve been waiting for.
While they all look Instagram ready, I always look horrible in pictures and at least 1 person will inevitably post a photo of me doing something weird.
What we bring to the table
1. It’s about priorities
It’s true that Jason and I have not yet married, but we’ve been together as a couple for over 13 years and we’ve lived together for over 12 years. Truth be told, it was a matter of priorities. Jason and I decided back when I was in my late 20’s to prioritize starting a family over getting married because we felt the clock ticking and we knew our journey to parenthood wouldn’t be easy. We tried for a long time to have our own biological children. After moving to adoption, our priorities remained the same. Plus, Jason and I have been together longer than most of my married friends and there’s no lack of commitment between us.
2. There’s no lack of children in our lives
It’s true that Jason and I have no children of our own. But the journey to parenthood hasn’t been easy. The fact that we’re still committed to start our family – now through adoption – speaks a lot of the commitment to any children we have the priviledge of raising.
And a lot of our friends and family have kids, giving us plenty of opportunities to watch over little ones and guaranteeing that any child we adopt won’t be lacking in family and other children to play with when they’re still little. In fact, another of my friends just announced she’s expecting her 2nd child later this year and one of my cousins just had another set of twins.
3. We’re a lot of fun!
From theme parks to rock concerts, comedy shows to museums, we’re always on the hunt for something to do – both in our own town and in places that we travel to. When we traveled to Vancouver, BC, Canada we spent 11 days seeing all the tourist spots and even taking in a local fair that happened to be in town. We love trying new restaurants and have an affinity for food trucks. We also make it a point to visit at least one museum when we travel so we can understand the culture and history of where we’re visiting.
4. No judgement on our part….
There are a number of reasons that women find themselves creating an adoption plan. When I lived in Ohio, I worked the graveyard shift at a pregnancy crisis hotline. I spoke with young girls who were a little fuzzy on the logistics of how children are conceived and I spoke with older women who had just sent their youngest off to college and was hoping for an empty nest. I’ve spoken to those who fell victim to their situation and others who were just overwhelmed with everything and everyone they already had to care for.
Likewise, Jason works in the foster care system. He sees everything from children who are stuck in legal custody limbo to kids who have been removed from the home for one reason or another.
We know that everyone’s story is unique; everyone’s “why” is different. No judgements from us. We’re just looking to be available as a blessing to the right woman who might need a helping hand in life. And in doing so, looking to be blessed with the priviledge of raising children too.
So we’re not the most Instagramable (is that a word? LOL) couple…
What we lack in photogenic faces, figures and smiles, we make up for in personality and our willingness to try new things for the experience. We hope to pass our sense of adventure on to any children we are blessed to raise – encouraging them to try new foods, learn about other cultures and have a sense of wonder about the world. Showing them, that when you remain open to others and their differences, it’s amazing just how small the world can become.
Choose us because…
So don’t choose us because you like the way we look in photos or because you’re impressed by the number of beach shots we’ve included in our website. Choose us because you want the child we raise to be encouraged to use their imagination, have amazing life experiences and maintain a sense of wonder for the world we live in.
Choose us because you can see this child thriving with us as their parents; because you see in us what you would want for this child’s life. Choose us because we’re not perfect for everyone, but because we’re perfect for you and your unique situation.
Good luck with everything. We wish you all the best!